Today is December 3rd, 2009, and exactly one year ago today, Chris and I had a terrible lunch at McCallister's Deli in Shreveport. No, the food wasn't bad. It was just the random location where we began to recover from a heart-breaking doctor's visit. We found out that day that the unborn twins I was carrying both had a permanently disabling birth defect called Spina Bifida.
What we were thinking THEN:
This is not fair. People have perfectly healthy babies every day. I have never smoked or even been a drinker. Young girls pop babies out all the time and don't even get pre-natal care. Some people don't even want their beautiful babies, and ours were PLANNED! Is it cruel to make them face a life full of challenges and health issues? Will they even make it? What quality of life will they have? Will they ever be independent? What have we done to Ellie (our then 18 month old)? Will she hate us for bringing home these special babies? How will we do this?
What we are thinking NOW:
Look at those perfect little chunky monkeys. They bring us joy every single day, and yes, it's tough sometimes. So far, other than a few surgeries and more doctor's visits than anyone would want to make, our lives are basically . . . . dare I say it? Normal. This is our new normal, and we are ok -- better than ok. Our boys, Jack and Woody, have taught us to focus on what matters, and fuhgettabout the rest of it. Looking back, I needed to be reminded of what life is really about, and it's not about being this smiling family of three on a white couch in matching Christmas sweaters. And it's not about living in a large and perfectly decorated home with an impressive financial portfolio. It's about people. Family. Love and laughter. Accepting one another and forgiving one another. Being a friend when someone's hurting. And keeping your mouth shut when you think you know better than them. It's about loving God and each other. If life isn't an adventure, then what's the point?
Updates at 8 months old:
Woody is eating from a spoon -- veggies, fruits, smooshy big people food, etc. He has one tooth finally, and he has had a little cold lately but has otherwise been a very healthy little man. We are excited about his progress with head and trunk control in physical therapy. He has been grasping much better and "da-da"ing up a stinkin' storm! We will follow up with the urologist, as Woody is having a little trouble emptying his bladder lately, but we'll take one day at a time.
Jack refuses to eat from a spoon and just wants his bottle, even though he has 3, going on 4, teeth! He is able to sit supported for a few minutes and has rolled from his belly to his back a couple times. He loves his toys and has also been making lots of adorable babbles like "ba-ba", "da-da," and "ma-ma"! We had a little scare with the respiratory funk last month, but after some breathing treatments, he perked right back up after a few days.
Both boys have leg movements at times, and they are starting to use their upper legs more and more to move and kick. We have high hopes for these two -- they are very social and very lovable. Ellie is a proud big sister, who loves to make her "boys" smile and laugh. She finds Woody's paci when he needs it and asks where they are as soon as she comes into the house. She knows they're here to stay, and she thinks that's ok!
No matter what medical stuff we might face in the future, we are so happy to have our family just as they are -- so perfect and so special.
